…as told by BMD reader, Abimifoluwa
“Oti mu o!!!!!!!” my sister shouted from the room after she saw me suddenly go down on my knees almost immediately that I had gotten up to pick my cake mixer from the dinning table. “you can’t go to church o… Henrietta, take (wraps 10k in her hand) take uber to the hospital and tell the doctor how you’re feeling.”
Prior to this Sunday, 8th of July… The day before was supposed to be my last antenatal session. At 39 weeks and 4 days, I was anxious to meet this little bundle of joy that had been growing and making me eat like a crazy person. I did makeup, wore a new dress with my favourite leggings – because nothing else fitted at the time. Requested a ride to my hospital and felt like the fliest yummy-mummy-to-be ever! So I got to this hospital, did my routine check ups and was ushered in to talk to my doctor. He told me, “are you ready to go insane for a whole day?” no-one said I wasn’t ready but no-one said I was too 😂. So I smiled.. I said “God will help me.” we had done scans 3 times to be sure it was the right color of stuff we were buying and because we wanted to be sure again, we decided to check my little sunshine.. Yes! Baby girl again for the 4th scan. I was so sure, so ready to meet my mini me. I said goodbye to the nurses.. “hopefully this week” doctor Kola said as I exited the hospital building… So the Sunday episode wasn’t expected. I baked on Saturday but to decorate on Sunday Na war.🙆 I got to this hospital, amidst false contractions, me that had make up on and dressed peng the day before… 😂 I wore a pink bra top and a pregnancy gown that my friend Tessy have me for this day with a big sweater on top of it. I wore my hair net and my bathroom slippers because, honestly I was feeling like I was running mad. Felt like nothing I had ever felt in this world. “please help me call Dr kola” I told one of the nurses as I lay down to receive another dose of pulling false contractions. I held my belly -as if it will make the contractions stop – and went through that episode till the doctor came. “madam Labake…” he said.. “what happened? Weren’t u here yesterday?” he asked. “I don’t know how I’m feeling ” I said …i can’t sleep I can’t do anything, I’m running temperature and my belly is rock hard but after minutes, it becomes normal. “Hahaha” he chuckled. “those are only false contractions” 😥😥😥watttttttttttt!!!! If these are false, how will the real thing feel!!! Hey God I was already running mad inside my brain.. 😂
“Madam, you have to go back home. I don’t want to do a vaginal examination to trigger anything. And your due date is still till July 11th. Today is 8th so calm down” he said to me. Hey God, I started crying.. 😂 me that was forming baddest from day one, the tears started trickling down my eyes dammit. I convinced him to please check me and he said fine. Let’s go to the examination room. “Ahhhhhhh” I screamed as he tried to examine me. “Relax madam,” he said. Sigh. I was fed up. I dropped the hospital bag containing all the pink things for the baby.. 😂 with disappointment, I requested another uber home. Still in the false contraction mood, I lay down to sleep. Ate little, just basic stuff that I could do. Eat, sleep, fold during contractions and all over again. So my friend called me.. We were supposed to do a photo-shoot but mehn.. I wasn’t feeling it at all. I cancelled the shoot that day and slept. Few hours into my sleep everywhere suddenly got hot. I decided to shower. I showered up to 12 times before daybreak because I was hot from inside out. I endured o. Since doctor Kola said I shouldn’t bother coming because it was false. Monday morning and I couldn’t go to school because I felt so sick. Tried to eat but the smell put me off. I drank tea instead.. Minutes after I threw up on the rug.. The contractions started again. I had called “baba habeebah” (my baby’s papa’s name is Habeeb so since we found out we were having a girl, we started calling her habeebah 😂 ) earlier that I felt really somehow and couldn’t eat that he should please get me pineapples -as I read that it induces labor very rapidly. He got home and brought the pineapple, for the sake of inducing labor, I took 2 pieces and stopped. The contractions got harder and we’re coming closer together. Now if the contractions start,i have to squeeze something or scream before this burning pain releases me from its anguish. Omo.. It went like that till 3 in the afternoon. Around past 4, I called doctor Kola, this was our conversation.
Dr k: did u see blood?
Dr k: did u see the mucus plug?
Dr k: did u see water?
Then don’t come yet. Keep yourself hydrated and drink ORS suspension for dehydration. Hey God! I 🙆will continue like this??? I was getting tired and cranky. The pains were closer. The screams were louder and my belly had dropped from the normal round and perky and was sitting on my thighs. Good thing!!!! My baby was coming down.. Ready to meet me!!!! 😥😥 I kept enduring this thing o. My cousin called her mom and told her how I was feeling. She hurried here and said “give me dettol, water and cotton wool lemme check what’s happening. Have u seen any sign? ” 😌😌😌I was tired of this question and so I hurriedly said no. Mama said lie down but the contractions were ongoing that time. The phone I was using to time it gaan I flung it somewhere. That was the end of timing this crap. I Don Taya 😥😌!!!! Finally that episode passed and I could lay down. With a nightingale under me, I placed my hand over my belly as another contraction was about to start. She went all in and 😱 screamed “Ori omo yii to wa nita o!!!” (the baby’s head is coming out o!!!) she said. “Ile Loma bimo yii si o” (she has to deliver this baby at home) my brother came in and said “no matter, please she has a hospital”. Omo, I was ready to push the baby out and get out of that discomfort in any way.Doctor Kola finally agreed for me to come. I had dropped the hospital bag the previous day and we (me, the midwife, my sister and my brother) we’re on our way to the hospital to bring habeebah home. Jesus!!! I called baba habeebah to come meet is there since he couldn’t get home in time to drive is there. The ride to the hospital Was The longest. We passed the shortest route but the baby’s head kept descending more and more. I felt like they were ripping my legs apart from inside my stomach. Mama asked me to close my legs and NOT PUSH. around past 5,we were in Ogba traffic. I was using my legs to push the passenger seat chair while screaming bc the contractions got worse as she kept descending. I literally turned the chair to the break pad.. 😂 I would push it and stretch along as I pushed the chair with my legs closed.. Jesus I was getting weak and tired. My body wasn’t mine again. I couldn’t even use pain killers if I wanted to. This pain was maddddddddd!!! I 😥just kept drinking Eva water. My throat was dry af. As we approached the hospital gate, I started smiling one fake smile that thank God!!! At last! The belly had dropped so I could not walk. The midwife and my brother held me on both hands.. They raised me to climb the small stairs leading to the reception. I got inside and the doctor said “take her up” immediately.. I was low-key happy 😂 before he sends me back again like yesterday. I got upstairs like a snail and then the original contractions started hooking me.This time around, I couldn’t even contain the pain anymore. I removed my abaya and the bra top I was wearing. I wanted no clothes at all the belly kept dragging me down. I would kneel on the tiles for the next couple contractions. I decided to have a bath.. My nurse teased me “Abi water bath Lo fe ni 😂” (or would u prefer a water bath?) at that point, anything to take me away from this moment will do. I showered o.. Came back outside I could not kneel again. I grabbed the midwife and squeezed her as in tightly hugging her as the subsequent contractions kept coming… 😂 I was squeezing the nurse first but she said she needed the hand to do something else in this life.. 😂 so she begged me to ease on the squeeze. 😂 I squeezed-hugged this midwife till the contractions stopped. Then doctor Kola came. “let me check how many centimeters you’re on now” please you people will have to excuse me he said to baba habeebah, my brother and others in the room.. Low-key I was happy it was finally coming to an end. 😥😌 “Oya lie down” he told me.. But another great story of contractions were ongoing so I folded on the bed and squeezed the iron cast of the bed instead.. I screamed so loud till I felt better. Finally after 2 minutes, this storm calmed and I could let him examine me. “6 centimeters,” he said 🙆🙆🙆”I’ll check you again once it’s 8pm. 😂 are you joking!!! 😥8 loun loun!!! Baba had disappeared. Everyone could come into the room now. I was seeing silhouettes not people anymore. People became black and white. I stopped seeing color 😂 I kept checking the time till 8 o clock. I want asked to go to the prepared Labour room. Omo I was egg-cited!!! I slowly and gently I got there. I was asked to lay down, given set of instructions for the procedure. “take plenty breaths” he said. 😥breathe with your mouth if you feel breathless and push only when I say”. I heard him but those instructions weren’t registered in my brain. So push madam he said.. I screamed!!!!!!!!!!! Madam I can see the head push and don’t stop. I screamed again o. At the top of my lungs stretch could go. He tapped me back into reality “madam you’re just screaming, you’re not doing anything ” I was putting so much hard work at least I thought. I had watched too many birth videos and I say how the pushed till they could not go on anymore. I screamed back at doctor Kola “please I don’t know what I’m doing please teach me how to push.. 😂 ” finally the midwife said “hold your legs and look at your abdomen. Close your mouth and give a long hard push” 🙆hey God. My own Don done today. There was no going back. I did exactly what she said. I made sure of that. After a long push, that I felt that I had finally gotten how to, doctor Kola tapped me again. “madam your baby will get tired with what you’re doing. Push madam” 🙆I opened my big mouth and started crying. He said push again. Before i could push till the end I heard “klamklam” the sound of the surgical scissors. Jesu😌!!! Watt!!!!!!Before I could understand again I just heard “klamklam” again and the pain went straight into my brains. The pain management drip wasn’t working for me. The 2 shots of pain relief on my thighs.. Have they faded????? 🤸🙆my own really don done. I cried and with the last push, she came sliding out with her sac still intact. He clamped the cord and slowly removed her from the sac. Omo my colored vision returned instantly… 😂 I saw plenty black lush curly hair!!!! OMG I was so tired but very excited!! But she wasn’t crying so much. Just ajebo 😢 cry. But they wanted to hear the long cry unno so they kept tapping her. Oju MI o gba(my eyes no fit collect am 😂)beating my BIG baby. BTW this baby was BIIG. they sha cleaned her body and I watched bit I saw something black under her Bombom. “Ahan aunty nurse what’s that”? I asked. 😂 “Aunty your baby is a boy o”😌😌😌🙆watttttttttttt! No o. She’s a girl o. “aunty he’s a boy o” omo I was weak. The midwife said “Oya come and carry your pink pink dresses and cap o and bring out something my baby boy will wear abeg” lol.. I was happy and confused at the same time. I just lay there lifeless and tired while they took my Bomboy to clean and dress him. I read about being jittery after delivery but I didn’t expect it to be sudden. I tarted vibrating. I asked the nurse to turn off the AC. I had sweated all over the Macintosh and I was still sweating inside AC 😅. They gave me shots on my thighs again and in no tie I was okay.So I’m here, thinking of my baby, obviously the only thing on my mind.. 😂 how the radiologist kept seeing girl and she turned out to have balls.. Like howwwwwwww!!!! I 😥I lasted there grateful for the safe and speedy delivery and then the doctor came back “I have to leave you for a moment. He’s not crying well but he’s going to be fine ” 🙆Whattt ! Before I could utter a word, he had disappeared. So I had this remaining placenta in me and the clamped cord still dangling from underneath. I prayed and then he cried. I was relieved. 😂 Ughhh.! My sister came in to see me after I had been delivered of the placenta. With my legs still hanging, waiting to get stitched up,i asked he to check if the tear was plenty 😂 she looked disgurrrrrrrstedd. obvs she had seen nothing like the insides of another person ever in this life. She lied and said no.😥😂 I had small hope. I said OK. So doctor k cane in with sutures and said it was time for death part 2. the stitching. I just told my sister not to go. To hold my hand through everything. I felt everything. As if they were seeing clothes in my brain. I cried, I screamed, there was nothing I didn’t endure just to go back to see my baby boy. I asked who was with him so he won’t be lonely. I was told my younger sister and his father were playing with him. I felt relieved. I thought the doctor had finished o. Till he said “remaining the second side” 🙆😌hey God. Today na today I said to myself in my mind. I was already swimming in my sweat!The stitching was over!!! 🤸HALLELUJAH!!! I 😥could finally see my baby. I walked back to my room. Yes!! I 🤸had enough energy to walk back. I saw him briefly and my heart was doing Gish Gish Gish Gish.. 😂 I was fucking hungry! 😂first things first. I was asked to shower, use a pad, eat, then come to see him. I hurriedly did everything. I left food and want to see him. I got to the room. Lights were on him and the neonatal oxygen mask. I was wondering why then the doctor said his breathing became shallow and his lungs were collapsing. Watttttttttttt!!! 😌I was weak in the knees. The doctor said the baby was tired from all the pushing and needed time to bounce back. Okay o! “my baby looked at me with one eye opened 😍 OMG his eyes were everything! He had his father’s skin (afin people), he had his nails, his hair, ahahn!! 😂 his nose. I weak o. Only thing he had that was mine was my lips. 😒 was it your father that carried you for 9 months??? 😂 I was ecstatic. I didn’t even take a picture. I looked and fell in love. I was lost for words I just kept smiling like someone they’ve were toasting.. 😂 I could not stand for long cos of my episiotomy and I just had a fucking baby!!!! Like!!! Burst of energy. O called my friends. I texted some on whatsapp “I Don born o”🤸”issa baby boy 😂😥😌”. Before I knew, all whtsapp status Don full. SMS just dey drop.the news if his arrival spun everywhere. I was happy! I was told to rest o. But Na phone I dey press.. 😂 we had to inform everyone.
Next morning, the doctor came to check how I was bleeding. He said it was normal. I asked about the baby’s health. He said he was getting better and we might go home today!!! I 🖤was mad happy!! That morning passed. Afternoon came, my family members were becoming plenty in the hospital. Ahahn what’s happening. They said I’ve been discharged. Ehen where’s the baby? They said we’d pick him. We need to gone first. Because in the NICU I can’t touch him, we have to pump breast milk for him, we had to go blahblahbah. That’s when I started crying. “how can I go home without a baby? “I screamed at them. Today, I’m not going anywhere!!! 😥 my brothers convinced me. That he was fine and when he was stable they’d allow me see him, cuddle and all. I believed them and so I went downstairs. Collected my drugs from the pharmacy and went home. The ride Was The second longest ride. We got home and my landlord accosted me. He didn’t know they had tricked me home. He looked sad and said “adupe pe omi Lo danu”(thank God the water only poured, the clay is still intact) I was confused! 🙆 my Aunty quickly signaled to him and he cut the conversation there and disappeared. I got upstairs and saw plenty people. Saw my father, his wife, my brothers, everyone! I started crying. It was true. They had left him in the car and tricked me home. Hey had buried him without letting me say goodbye. I was mad with rage but I was calm. “Aunty Ronke, he’s still in the ICU, let’s go”.she turned. Looked at me and said…There’s no baby anymore and there’s no ICU. I wanted to die! 😌 😥 I had to sit down to process this news. There was no point. He had been buried. But the only thing was THEY took a pic before they put him to rest. That was all? one picture to make up for 9 months and my one day crazy madness whoever giving birth? 🙆I wasn’t understanding. I needed more. I needed it to be a dream. Nightmare. To wake up to him next to me and everything I had had in pile up for this boy. But God understands. I wept day and night because it wasn’t understandable but everything was clear now. I was shattered.
Thank God for Grace. Two weeks after, I wrote my final exam and still guess who’s graduating!!!!!!! Me!!! When life gives you lemons, maximize the use and make more than lemonades.
It’s 3 months now. ‘God has been faithful and he still is! .
Today, I made my Baby proud! I passed my Exam!